Stephen Colbert on the claim that if Jesus were around today, he’d be a liberal except for an issue or two. My transcribed money quote from the December 16th Colbert Report (emphasis sorta-mine, you can hear it in his tone):

But if Jesus really is a liberal, it’s time to get the Christ out of Christmas. Now you know me, I’m not fan of the term xmas or x-anything. I make my kids play Christbox 360. And if they break a bone they get christ-rays. But it’s time to take baby Jesus out of the manger and replace him with something that’s easier to swallow. How about a honey-baked ham? Because if this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn’t help the poor either: we’ve got to pretend that Jesus is just as selfish as we are or we’ve got to acknowledge that he commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition and then admit that we just don’t want to do it.

Or, as an oft-quoted item I’ve seen on the internet says: Every time I hear blowhards claim this is a Christian nation – I just point out the poverty rate is 14.3%. Christian nation? No, we’re not.